As time went on, she was just so sick, her body was wasting away, succumbing to the horrible cancer that was spreading throughout it. She fought and fought and even through the sickness she shared so much life and laughter with those around her. In the last few days of her life, we laughed, we cried, we cherished our memories together.
I don’t think I could have ever been prepared to say goodbye, so I didn’t. I told her how much I loved her and we talked about future plans to travel and planned a baby shower for her grandbaby that was on the way. We held onto the hope for the days ahead, or at least I did. I never really thought I would have to live a life where she wasn’t a phone call away. She was my rock, my sharp taste of reality when I needed it, my shoulder to cry on, and my very dear friend. Good friends are hard to come by but she was a true friend.
I remember going through the motions the day of her funeral, just showing up was all I could do. They played a video of her that day, which I wasn’t prepared for, to see her smile, to hear her voice. She knew this day was coming, but in some ways she was more prepared for it than many of her loved ones. She knew there was a much more beautiful place in Heaven waiting for her where she would be pain free.
She left a message to be shared and it was that she was going to be here…she was a butterfly now. My beautiful friend was a butterfly, just like the necklace and bracelet I unknowingly chose to wear that morning.
She isn’t physically here anymore, but she is here in so many ways. I miss her every single day. When I need her most, she seems to show up, my butterfly. I wish for just one more day, one more time to hear her laughter or see her smile, but for now that isn’t possible. What I do have are all the precious memories of her kindness, her generosity, her honesty and her love. And I know many people around me have experienced a loss like this as well.
Let your butterfly go, let them fly, give them the freedom to be free of sickness and pain and be just as beautiful as ever! And when you need them most, close your eyes and remember their smile, let yourself hear their laughter, and kiss your butterfly as they fly away until another day.
This week’s collection is in honor of Dee - named Old San Juan because we were hoping to take a trip together to Puerto Rico! She always dressed her best for work, wearing a suit and heels so we selected the a skort romper that is very classy. We also included some adorable, soft bamboo crops because she loved to be comfortable and Italian tops and of course a silk butterfly scarf and necklace!